Chapter 50: Togo Napshin (2)

Part 3

“Good thing it’s not worse. Some people are laid out with period cramps the whole time,” Dad said.

“…Isn’t that a bit too blunt?” I replied.

“What? You were pretty intense yourself yesterday,” he teased.

He told me not to worry, yet here he was poking fun. I wanted to call him out, but with Dad’s subtle grin and Mom’s outright laughter, it was clear any retort would fall flat. Feeling the weight of my actions, I sulkily stabbed a marinated quail egg with my chopsticks and popped it into my mouth. My guilt made it hard to argue back.

“Make sure you’re nice to Sanghyeon tonight. He didn’t say anything, but he probably had a rough time,” Dad added.

“Ugh…” I groaned.

His words, laced with amusement, hit hard. I had been unfair—snapping at Sanghyeon, making things difficult. He’d borne the brunt of my mood yesterday.

“He doesn’t need money or anything. If he wants something, he just buys it. I can’t think of what to get him…” I said.

“You don’t fix family stuff with money. Just say you’re sorry and be extra kind for a few days,” Mom chimed in.

“Still…” I mumbled.

Sanghyeon had every right to be annoyed or angry, yet he took it all without a single complaint. A simple apology felt insufficient, pricking at my conscience. It was embarrassing to admit, but he was probably better off financially than me anyway…

“With his personality, I doubt he’d care about some expensive gift,” Dad said.

“…Maybe you’re right,” I conceded.

I recalled how Sanghyeon lit up with every donation, not out of greed but gratitude for the kindness. A pricey gift might feel like a cop-out, like saying, “Here, take this and let’s call it even.”

“How about something heartfelt, like homemade food?” Mom suggested.

“Are you just trying to trick me into cooking?” I shot back.

Her eyes sparkled as she burst into laughter. “Caught me!” she said without saying it, her joy so quintessentially her. I couldn’t help but let out a hollow chuckle, half-exasperated.

“Still not giving up on cooking with your daughter, huh?” Dad teased her.

“Haha…” I laughed awkwardly.

Words failed me, so I just smiled and let out a soft laugh. I’d always thought “someday” about cooking with her, but with my recent screw-ups, saying no felt impossible.

“Stop teasing her. Don’t you have work?” Dad said to Mom.

“Teasing? I’m always serious,” she replied.

Her insistence on “serious” only made my heart heavier.

The breakfast table passed with light, silly banter. They really get me, I thought. Even as I told myself not to lean on their kindness, warmth spread in my chest.

I’m lucky. Smiling to myself, I fiddled with my chopsticks, letting out soft giggles. When Mom asked what was so funny, I answered with another laugh. Their smiles felt like a quiet promise: Everything’s going to be okay.

Part 4

The family—except for Sanghyeon, still asleep—had been understanding, but one big hurdle remained. After seeing my parents off to work, I snuck into Sanghyeon’s room, swiping an old webcam he’d said I could use if needed, and slipped back out.

Heart pounding, I returned to my room and mimicked Sanghyeon’s setup, adjusting the cam shakily before opening my laptop with care. I went straight to his stream VODs, specifically yesterday’s.

• No other word besides ‘idiot’?
• …You guys are all kinda weird. What’s so great about that? So dumb.
• …Moron. Fool.
• …Why are you laughing? Why do you like hearing this stuff…?!

“Ughhh…” I groaned.

She went on, saying, Don’t laugh, idiots, then repeating idiot, idiot, idiot while giggling to herself. I hadn’t noticed yesterday, but Sanghyeon, unusually quiet, was biting his lip to hold back laughter.

“What the hell? Idiot, moron…” I muttered.

I wanted to die of embarrassment. Sprinkled throughout were moments like Stop saying dumb stuff, Are you drunk? or No, why would you do that?—things that must’ve stung viewers. Guilt was there, but shame overwhelmed it.

I need to apologize on stream! I’d fired up the laptop with resolve, but watching this crushed it.

Calling people ‘idiot’ like a ten-year-old…

It felt like I was being mocked, but instead of something sharp or witty like Seokyoon or Seongyoon might’ve thrown, I’d gone childish.

“Arghhh…” I wailed.

Unable to watch more, I paused the video and dove onto my bed, burying my face in a pillow and pounding the mattress. I watched a bit more, pounded again, watched again…

“Like a kid!” I cried.

If I’d at least cursed properly, I could’ve apologized sincerely on stream without hesitation. Why did I do this, yesterday’s me? Now I was more worried about being mocked than saying sorry.

No need to keep torturing myself with the VOD. No matter how annoying the donations or questions were, I shouldn’t have acted like that. I’d meant to note who to apologize to, but the whole thing was such a mess that picking out specific wrongs felt absurd.

“…Just start the stream,” I told myself.

Right. Bow my head, say I wasn’t myself yesterday, explain a bit. And then…

“…Haa.”

What if they said they were fed up or disappointed? Junseok said family understood, but viewers? They had no reason to shrug it off with Everyone has bad days.

With trembling hands, I started the stream. The nickname “CheungjeokunNuna” felt heavier than ever.

“Ahem… cough,” I cleared my throat.

It was a weekday morning—probably not many viewers. I’d stream again before Sanghyeon’s. That’s what I thought when—

• Nunabbattajo????

“…Oh. Good morning, Dununttutturuppara-ppa-nim,” I said.

The quiet chat sparked to life, and the viewer count began to climb.

Part 5

[Is This Really the Same Person…?] – Anonymous

• Made a side-by-side edit since so many people were talking about it ^^ Default Nunabbattajo vs. Dark Nunabbattajo, comparing reactions to similar donation messages. Includes this morning’s stream.

┕ Anonymous: Look at that mood swing lololol.
┕ Anonymous: ‘Idiot idiot idiot idiot’ vs. ‘Calling you idiots was too harsh’ lololol.
┕ Anonymous: She doesn’t curse even if her life depends on it. I wanna be scolded harshly but… sigh…
┕ Anonymous: Cheungjeokun’s reactions show she’s under a spell, but ‘idiot’ being her worst insult while losing it is kinda amazing lol.
┕ Anonymous: Truly a pure soul~
┕ Anonymous: How do you even get this kind of footage?
┕ Anonymous (OP): Had a feeling this day would come~ After a month, I figured something was up, just a hunch~
┕ Anonymous: Oh.
┕ Anonymous: Lolol.
┕ Anonymous: ??? What’s going on? Why do you all act like you know why she went dark? I didn’t miss any streams.
┕ Anonymous: One clueless dude lol.